The first hurdle a single person will face when they are ready to get back to dating is filling out an online profile. Whilst it is not a compulsory thing to do, it is a bit like looking for a job – it’s good to have an online presence. And exactly like writing a CV, you then become overly conscious about the best way to come across and ‘sell yourself’ properly.
There are a few traps easy to fall into but it is actually quite simple to get it right if you follow these simple rules:
- First of all, there is little point in over agonising about what to write: less is more. People feel they have to say everything about themselves but writing your entire life story isn’t what it’s about here so keep it short and sweet. Having said that, it also does need to have a bit of depth. Ideally, you should be aiming for 2 to 3 small paragraphs.
- Make it interesting and different. So many online profiles say the same thing and most will have something along the lines of ‘I like to go out but I also like to stay in with a bottle of wine and a DVD’. It is actually true that most people enjoy both these activities so why point it out? It doesn’t actually say much about you as a person.
- Ask your family and friends what their perception of you is and what your quirks are. We all have them whether we like it or not… So pick one and just say something to spark interest. It then makes it easy for someone to ask you a question. For instance, I am particularly accident prone so that would be something I would add as it is different, honest and an obvious source of questioning.
- Be upbeat and positive. A lot of people seem to be so negative in their profiles about how online dating is a waste of time, how fed up they are that they have been hurt, that there doesn’t seem to be anyone out there and how it’s everyone else’s fault that they are single. My advice to these people would be to look at themselves first and if you hate online dating that much then don’t do it. The whinging and negativity are far from attractive and actually put people off.
- Checking your spelling and grammar are two obvious things to do. There really is no excuse to get that bit wrong these days.
- Another thing to remember is that a lot of profiles seem to list of everything they want or don’t want in a person. It is actually quite boring to read someone’s rigid checklist and shows a distinct lack of flexibility or spontaneity. Instead of being so demanding, what about telling people what you have to offer? Let them be the judge of whether your qualities are what they are looking for rather than trying to fit in an unrealistic list.
- In terms of pictures, you only really need to add a couple and they need to be of you as opposed to some wonderful scenery taken out of your last holiday, as it really doesn’t say much about what you look like. Just make sure the photos are recent and that you are smiling.
The key really is to remember to keep it light hearted and you. It is about giving a snippet of who you really are as a person, not what you think people will want to read.
I am currently offering some free 30-minute Breakthrough Sessions, where we will look at where you are now and where you want to be. Together, we will look at ways to get you there FAST so that you can start getting the results that you want.