It is surprising how we sometimes still hold a bit of a torch or just always had a soft spot for a certain person… Some partners actually touch our hearts in a different way and leave a longer lasting mark. When we look back, our mind can wonder about what would have been or question why the relationship really ended. Maybe that person is even the one regret you have because you let go. There is a particular sentimental element about this and as we reflect, thinking about our time together, our heart swells and fills with warmth.
Sometimes, relationships end because the time is just not quite right. Sometimes, just because both people are on different journeys and have to go through separate life experiences.
And then one day, after years apart, life throws a bit of synchronicity your way and you meet again or circumstances alter, causing you to question things. That little niggly something between you two is still there…
So what should you do? Should you both explore your feelings again? Is it really a good idea? After all, it didn’t work the first time round so it surely is a recipe for disaster?
Obviously, each situation will be different and needs to be assessed on its own merits but it is worth remembering that we all change as we go through life. We all get through different experiences, which mould us and make us grow. Very few people could argue they are the same person today than they were 10 or 15 years ago. It is worth bearing in mind that some of us however do change more than others.
So the question is, have you both evolved in the same way or towards the same life purpose? After all, it could just be that the timing was off when you first met and that you are now ready for each other. And there really is only one way to find out… Talking. The key here is honest communication and remaining true to who you are now. Meeting someone from the past can sometimes take you back to the person you were with them (for a short while) as opposed to the person you have become.
As both will have changed, you will be getting to know each other in exactly the same way as you would with someone new. The only real difference is that you have a bit of a past together and some shared memories. In this circumstance, because we already know the person, we will feel a certain sense of security and comfort which will reassure us in some way.
It is therefore worth pointing out that for those reasons, there may be higher expectations and you should be mindful of that. The feelings of disappointment and hurt will both be exacerbated if things don’t work out this time.
So… should you?
Well ultimately, it is up to you but life threw you back together for a reason so as long as you are both on the same page, why not find out? After all, whether it works or not, it is better to know than to live life with regrets or questions. It could just be that the chapter needs to be closed and a lesson learnt from it all. It could also just be that you weren’t ready for each other before but have grown to now be perfect together.
If the flame can be re-ignited, it was never totally extinguished.