It is often a struggle to work out whether someone likes you or not when you start dating. It is actually normally quite easy to read anyone if you have no interest in them whatsoever but the minute you decide you like the person, it feels like it’s impossible. We are our own worst enemies in that respect as our emotions totally muddy our perspective and rationality. It is worth reminding ourselves that our gut instincts will tell us all we need to know… and we can always rely on that, although we may not always listen and just see what we want to see.
You also have to believe that you can read the signs, as if you keep on saying to yourself that you can’t, you will indeed never be able to. So here are a few tips to help.
First of all, it is easy to tell if someone is interested in you or not by the way they talk to you. If they are trying to fuel the conversation with pertinent questions and want to find out more about you, you will just know that they do. You can just tell if there is a genuine interest by what they ask and how they interact with you. The speech and tone of voice will also give clues as to whether they mean what they say.
It is important to look at the overall picture too. There are a few elements of body language that will speak volumes. Mirroring for instance shows how someone naturally likes you and that you are on the same level. But it’s worth bearing in mind that one size does not fit all and there may be some variables depending on the person and their cultural background or upbringing.
A general good sign to look out for is whether someone is smiling or not. A genuine smile is easy to recognise. If you also look at the person’s general posture, you will get more clues. Personal space, especially in the UK, is normally something that people respect and we only get closer to those we like.
Another good indicator is to actually look into their eyes. Not only is it the window to the soul but you will be able to determine from the way they look back at you. Also, when someone is interested, their pupils will normally be dilated (word of warning, this also happens when drugs or drinks are consumed). Always communicate eye to eye, there’s nothing worse than trying to have a conversation with someone who isn’t looking at you.
Moreover, remember that the other person may also be trying to read you so make sure you are you and be natural. Don’t try too hard to come across as you feel they may want you to, remain true to yourself and do not try to control too much of your own body language, as this normally results in giving out a lot of mixed signals.
It is worth noting to always say what you mean and not use hints. It’s especially important at the early stage of dating where you are only getting to know each other as it is all too easy to get misunderstood.
Reading the signs isn’t actually as difficult as you may think. Just remember to try not to read too much into things either, you are only getting to know the person at that point and we all have quirks… Enjoy the process.
I am currently offering some free 30-minute Breakthrough Sessions, where we will look at where you are now and where you want to be. Together, we will look at ways to get you there FAST so that you can start getting the results that you want.